Am I Still a Christian?

Out here, in this messy web of personal identity and political association, I am weary of being a Christian, precisely because I am so uninterested in negotiating that identity.

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When Believers Do Not Believe

I have come to think people of faith are the most unbelieving bunch. In everyday parenting, there comes situations when I have to question my children on what they have done or not done, said or not said. If they sense that I have any trace of disbelief in their answer, their plea for me…

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Art & Justice

A few years ago, at the height of my faith deconstruction, I was being swallowed whole by cynicism. My soul was so raw, the naivete of my childhood faith ruthlessly stripped away as I was learning hard lessons in the world. I don’t even remember how I behaved outwardly at the time, friends tell me…

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Faith and Intellect

“I can’t reconcile a God who provides a fax machine but doesn’t rescue 800 refugees from drowning,” my friend says to me, referring to Christians expressing gratefulness for simple provisions juxtaposed with the realities of global suffering. This is not the first time I grappled with friends in conversations about the nature of God and…

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Attending a White Conference – Follow Up

“This conference isn’t made for me,” my new friend Drew says to me by the fireplace in Calvin College’s Prince Conference Room at the Festival of Faith & Writing. “It isn’t made with my needs in mind.” I nod in understanding, because of course it wasn’t. It was presented for the majority white people who…

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Strangely Dim

In many ways I have become extremely progressive and, gulp, liberal. That’s why I surprise myself when conservative evangelical lingo, prayers, songs, tumble out of me as naturally as if I still recite them every day. And it’s not just the ease and familiarity with which I utter them that is unexpected, but that these…

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