Blog

Dealing with the Regret of Deconstruction

“But then you wouldn’t have met me.” This is my husband’s go to line throughout the many years of my deconstruction. When you tear apart the fabric of your spiritual and identity formation, one familiar theme emerges over and over again: regret. I mean, I think given the finitude of being human, we all experience…

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My “Empty The Pews” Story

As a young woman, I was also Wild At Heart, but unfortunately that story was reserved for men. Converted by Christian missionaries at 12 years old, I came of age in evangelical youth culture looking for an adventure that would be mine. There are many things young women can look forward to in evangelicalism—marrying a…

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How to Raise Politically Engaged Children

Before we get to the how, let’s ask why.  Why should we raise politically engaged children? Shouldn’t a child’s primary job be to simply play and go to school? Play and education are important for kids, but neither of those things are politically neutral. We should raise politically engaged children because it is a fundamental…

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Religious Trauma: Looking for the Exit Doors

A healthy church should have porous walls and open doors. I’ve been saying stuff like this as I consider what healthy spirituality can look like, how churches can “do better.” Because authoritarianism, coercing members to stay against their will, is not healthy religion, it’s a cult. Healthy commitment to a community freely flowing out of…

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Deconstruction Updates

Does this mean my deconstruction is over? People who are a few laps behind me on the deconstruction journey want to know whether there is an end to the madness. Is there an end to the suffering? Can there be constructive paths forward? What happens to the threads after we unravel, does it weave itself back into something more beautiful, or lay limply on the floor as loose, strewn strings?

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Navigating the Faith Generation Gap

I had to teach my son how to hold the phone up to his ear in order to hear and talk into it. He knew how to face time and skype, but putting a phone up to his ear was archaic for his generation. I found it amusing, but there is another type of generation…

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6 Exvangelical Superpowers

As many of us have deconstructed the toxic religious teaching of our upbringing, I keep hearing over and over again that the most painful result of this journey is the loss of community.

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Why I’m not Raising Social Justice Warriors

… justice for children also means we give them time and space to play.

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Why I’m not a Bridge Builder within Evangelicalism

In other admittedly harsh words, evangelicals only give a limited degree of freedom to one subset of human beings if they can surely throw other human beings under the bus.

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