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Self-Love =/= Hyper Individualism

December 10, 2018

Self-love, self-improvement & self-empowerment is NOT about hyper individualism. 

A community formed by erasing individuality is not about submitting to one another in love, as I was told growing up evangelical, it was about letting those who hold power in those communities to KEEP THEIR POWER. This is why you hear arguments from complementarians that require gold medal mental gymnastics such as, “the husband submits in love to the wife too, but ultimately they make final decisions!” Wait, what?!?!

For people who have been historically marginalized, asserting your right to be whole human beings – to love and cherish yourself, to assert your opinions, to consent to relationships – this is not hyper individualism, this is JUSTICE. 

A society cannot truly flourish unless all of its citizens have space to thrive. And every individual member cannot thrive unless they get to be fully themselves. The assertion of individuality LEADS DIRECTLY to a healthy community.

Loving yourself is one of the best ways to build a healthy society, one in which we are managing our anxieties instead of projecting it onto others. It is where the deep healing of one’s soul transforms the larger landscape. It is radical and just and POWERFUL.

Love yourself.